You may be what is wrong with society. No big deal.

Youth homelessness. The concept sounds so tragic; and, these days, it evokes a potential Madonna/Angelina Jolie-esque kid snatcher in all of us. There is an immediate sense of empathy for a youth with no fixed address due to the general consensus that no child should go without proper shelter or food. There is no argument here. However, there is a double standard that is constantly present and, seemingly, widely accepted that is unjust.

When there is a full grown adult parked on a sewer grate at a major intersection, we avoid this unmaintained and unbathed person at all costs. We become blind to their hardships and deaf to their pleadings. Suddenly your phone is imaginarily ringing – oh that sneaky vibrate function; no one ever knows when you’re actually lying just to avoid an uncomfortable situation. Or you suddenly find yourself lost and need to stare up at street signs, buildings and clouds to guide you to where you need to go.

Yet is your reaction the same when you see a youth curled up on the curb, the dirt on its face streaked away by hopeless tears? I guarantee right now you feel a little worse than two sentences ago. There is a tendency to feel more empathy for a homeless youth rather than an adult. However, isn’t it youths who are always branded as being naïve and ignorant; for making bad choices and refusing to pay the consequences? Meanwhile the homeless adults are judged for their assumed capability to make better decisions than youths can. If this is, in fact, a common belief then there is a definite disconnect here.

While youth are given the benefit of the doubt for their naive lack of life experiences, adults are scorned for ever making a bad decision with their assumed abundance of wisdom. It seems when a homeless youth is spotted, the general assumption is that they were subject to intolerable conditions. Perhaps the child ran away from an abusive home or had become an orphan and was not financially taken care of. Perhaps it was simply neglect and abandonment. Maybe it was a Romeo and Juliet situation. Two foolish pre-teens run off together under the frivolous pretence of love, only to learn that love is an abstract concept. Sorry kiddies, Lionel Richie lied – love will not conquer all. Unless, of course, your love is a contractor, turned electrician, turned hunter and chef. This, then, would really help avoid the whole lack of shelter, warmth, and sustenance issue.

So at what age, or which turn of the century, are the youth expected to simply know better? In a “National Symposium on Homelessness Research” journal, written for the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development, one is considered a “youth” up until the age of 17. Granted the journal is from 1998, but now 17 year olds are graduating from high school. They are moving into campus residences to begin their post-secondary education. They are one year away from voting. That’s right. Society has given them the right to partake in national decisions in how the country will be run, and yet we give them the benefit of the doubt if we happen to step on them on the sidewalk.

It’s this benefit that may also be why there seems to be much more awareness and resources for homeless youth as opposed to adults. There is no denying there are resources for both, but there is much more emphasis given for youths. Whether it is that youths have less options or resources, this only enhances the level of difficulty adults may have to seek help. There is always a balanced spectrum in any given cause. The more empathy and benefit of a doubt given to youths, the more shame and disappointment adults feel in themselves. Not to mention the less they believe they can change or that the even deserve better.

At the end of the day, regardless of age or circumstances, it is only those who are willing to change their situation that can be helped. No matter how much life experience has been gained, the number of opportunities given, or the reason for such circumstances, it is up to you to help yourself. Never think it is too late. Take advantage of the resources available to you and, as a general rule to life, respect every opportunity you get. Everyone has their own story and hardships, and you will be surprised how many others will always have it worse than you. So respect the spectrum because, from one extreme to the other, your compassion and understanding alone does help. Your ignorant judgment does not.